I know I like to stick my tongue in my cheek around here,

but I’d like to clarify right off the bat that I truly and deeply believe that this is a very good idea.

I first wrote about it back in May:
“Apparently, NY payphones don’t make any money as payphones- their primary value is as a streetlevel advertising platform- a special platform that skirts normal regulations for installing street level advertising. I’m told that they’re even installing more payphones in NYC, even though ubiquitous cell phones are putting the payphone very much out of business.

You know what I’d like to see? If they’re going to maintain, and even grow, the network of payphones as an adverting-revenue generating platform, then they should make all local calls free. That is the old “Contract” of advertising, after all: We shouldn’t have to be exposed to your damn ads if you’re not going to give us something back in return. And how great would it be to know that whenever you hit NYC, getting in contact with the person you’re staying with is as close as the nearest payphone? It would be a great thing for tourists trying to avoid steep roaming charges. As a non-cellphone owner I would LOVE it. And it’s good for locals too. Cell’s dead? PayFreePhone. Lose your cell, need to call your moms? FreePhone. Bars closed, and you’re out on the streets drunk, hungry, and in need a Taxi? Dial “CAB” at the nearest FreePhone and be connected to the nearest cab dispatcher. Dial “INFO” to be connected to a tourism help desk. The possibilities are exciting and immeasurable.

Lets use this incredible, pre-existing infrastructure for something more than advertising.”

Now, it’s hard to be sure exactly how much money payphones pull in as an advertising platform, as reports on ad revenue often rely on the companies to be self-reporting, and they are known to cook the books, but a 2007 New York Times article; As Billboards, Public Phones Always Work by Jo Craven McGinty placed the revenue at 62 million annually. You can bet that it’s even more valuable now, as advertisers have been fleeing the sinking ship of old media since 2007, and have been putting more and more money into online and public advertising.

With this work, I’m asking you to consider the cost of providing the service of free local calling as a kind of tax on the tremendous cash cow of using public payphones as an advertising platform. It’s a way for advertisers to move in good faith towards restoring the balance of the old contract- which is, again: We shouldn’t have to see your ads unless you give us something in return. The problem of public advertising (and one of the big reasons there is such a backlash to it in the zeitgeist right now) is that it takes without giving. It only takes and takes and takes. It is aggressive, invasive, demanding, even illegal, and entirely one-sided. They are making MILLIONS off of us. Isn’t it time they gave something back? Isn’t it time we ended this one-sided abusive relationship?

Free Phone. It should already be happening. Let’s fight for it!

And then lets tear down half the billboards and get all the remaining billboards to provide free WiFi access points.